Exploring the value of reading as a part of a BDSM education
Where to begin.
Sex, philosophy, and getting around the BDSM community
The art, science, and heart of control.
The how and why of yielding and the soul of surrender.
How to safely do that thing that sounds fun and kinky.
About Normanís Chronicles of Counter Earth.
The curious ways of D/s in internet based relationships.
Stories, art, and poetry shared by our members.
Analyzing the order and things to think about.
Through a door in the Courtesanís palazzo Attic, is a rare rooftop garden in Venice. High walls prevent the cityís carnevale patrons from viewing the flowers gracing the hidden bounty of the lush garden, but those that dare to visit the Courtesanís home are always welcome to wander the tiny paths and revel in the beauty of every flower and thorn. In The Garden, guests learn and share the ideas and realities of pain mixed with pleasure and a moment or lifetime of consensual service.
The elements of power exchange first engage the concept of humanís personal power. We are born with this power, developing it as we mature, and use it to function in daily life. We use it to make decisions about our personal lives, business, and interactions with others; it is the element of control that we, have over our lives and everything surrounding us. In BDSM and in a D/s relationship, some or all of one individualís (the submissive or slaveís) personal power is voluntarily given, through negotiation, to another person (the Dominant), in exchange for the fulfillment of certain requirements. In a scene, the bottom yields control or power to the Top through and for the same means. "The depth of power yielded by the submissive is equal to the level of responsibility assumed by the dominant." 1
Many myths surrounding BDSM and Domination and submission. One long-lived myth that one party is being abused by someone in some kind of authority. The Garden and the majority of lifestyle participants do not espouse or condone abuse in any way and insist that every journey, activity and relationship be safe, sane, and consensual in every way. We reject bullies and abusers. Other myths include the idea that every interaction involves "whips and chains" and involve "masters and slaves". This is far from the truth, yet very close to it. While a certain amount of bondage and erotic pain may be involved in the sensual aspect of a Dominant/submissive relationship, it is not always included in the choices made by a couple; they alone decide on what happens in their personal dynamic. Also, not all bottoms are submissive, not all submissives are slaves, just as not every top is Dominant, and not every Dominant is a Master. The couple decides on the depth of the power exchange. As in relationships that do not include BDSM, the couple alone decides on the rules of the relationship and every couple is different. "There is no right or wrong way to do BDSM."2 Join us in reading and sharing our thoughts through our archived writing, forums, and support pages. Ask questions, and with us, learn about how and why we do what we do but please remember that while learning and starting online can be wonderful, one on one, offline experience is the best, most fulfilling teacher.
1 Screw the Roses, Send Me the Thorns: The Romance and Sexual Sorcery of Sadomasochism, Miller and Devon, Mystic Rose Books,1995, p. 235
2 The Loving Dominant, John Warren, ed.2, Greenery Press, 2000. p. 15
If you love The Garden, please consider donating a few dollars to help us pay our server bill at http:://www.themasque.org. Thanks!
- on 05/03/2017 2:02 PM 0 Comments
I need some help with The WIKtT Archives. We are wrapping the old Obscurus Books site into it's own "book" on TWA and I need some help getting everything moved over. Can you help? Drop me a line through the link below.
- on 03/17/2016 2:06 AM 0 Comments
RESOLVED †It looks like new password requests are not being processed properly on The Masque and The WIKTT Archives. It looks like it might be a result of that server migration. I am working with our host on the issue and will let you know what's going on. In the meantime, feel free to send me a request to do it by hand. Email me at email@example.com and I'll fix it for you!
- on 11/13/2015 9:12 PM 0 Comments
A semi-fantastical look at the reality of being a pro Dominatrix.
For those who are interested in service submission, it can be very difficult to find any sort of learning or teachings on service.
Elocution is the execution of expressive speech - pronunciation, articulation, vocalisation, intonation, modulation, tone and style.
There are a lot of ideas out there as to what a Mommy Domme is, a lot of preconceived ideas probably based on talking to third party or biased others, or, God forbid, porn. Here's mine...
A fast guide to the rules and protocols you might encounter in a leather/BDSM/fet gathering with some do's and don'ts.
There is no one way to give service or execute tasks but here are what UNG considers the 5 commandments for service
We need to start supporting, fostering, being a patron of Dominants because they are so cynical that they can't recognize true submission any more and some tips on how to do so.
What Are the Characteristics of a Service Submissive and Why?
Personal grooming is perhaps the most intimate duty that can be performed between a service submissive and the Dominant he/she is serving.
A few go to items that I like to always have on hand to tackle certain tasks or jobs.
If someone is offering service, it can often be very difficult for the receiver to know how to act, how to accept such service.
One of the misconceptions of service submission is service means free labour. Service, has a cost - both seen and unseen - and it can be calculated.
Replying to a personal ad, or showing someone you're interested in him/her, has become a lost art.
My reference notes from a talk I gave on Service Submission, to MAsT Sydney, July 2016.
There are many pro's and con's to being single and being unowned.