Exploring the value of reading as a part of a BDSM education
Where to begin.
Sex, philosophy, and getting around the BDSM community
The art, science, and heart of control.
The how and why of yielding and the soul of surrender.
How to safely do that thing that sounds fun and kinky.
About Normanís Chronicles of Counter Earth.
The curious ways of D/s in internet based relationships.
Stories, art, and poetry shared by our members.
Through a door in the Courtesanís palazzo Attic, is a rare rooftop garden in Venice. High walls prevent the cityís carnevale patrons from viewing the flowers gracing the hidden bounty of the lush garden, but those that dare to visit the Courtesanís home are always welcome to wander the tiny paths and revel in the beauty of every flower and thorn. In The Garden, guests learn and share the ideas and realities of pain mixed with pleasure and a moment or lifetime of consensual service.
The elements of power exchange first engage the concept of humanís personal power. We are born with this power, developing it as we mature, and use it to function in daily life. We use it to make decisions about our personal lives, business, and interactions with others; it is the element of control that we, have over our lives and everything surrounding us. In BDSM and in a D/s relationship, some or all of one individualís (the submissive or slaveís) personal power is voluntarily given, through negotiation, to another person (the Dominant), in exchange for the fulfillment of certain requirements. In a scene, the bottom yields control or power to the Top through and for the same means. "The depth of power yielded by the submissive is equal to the level of responsibility assumed by the dominant." 1
Many myths surrounding BDSM and Domination and submission. One long-lived myth that one party is being abused by someone in some kind of authority. The Garden and the majority of lifestyle participants do not espouse or condone abuse in any way and insist that every journey, activity and relationship be safe, sane, and consensual in every way. We reject bullies and abusers. Other myths include the idea that every interaction involves "whips and chains" and involve "masters and slaves". This is far from the truth, yet very close to it. While a certain amount of bondage and erotic pain may be involved in the sensual aspect of a Dominant/submissive relationship, it is not always included in the choices made by a couple; they alone decide on what happens in their personal dynamic. Also, not all bottoms are submissive, not all submissives are slaves, just as not every top is Dominant, and not every Dominant is a Master. The couple decides on the depth of the power exchange. As in relationships that do not include BDSM, the couple alone decides on the rules of the relationship and every couple is different. "There is no right or wrong way to do BDSM."2 Join us in reading and sharing our thoughts through our archived writing, forums, and support pages. Ask questions, and with us, learn about how and why we do what we do but please remember that while learning and starting online can be wonderful, one on one, offline experience is the best, most fulfilling teacher.
1 Screw the Roses, Send Me the Thorns: The Romance and Sexual Sorcery of Sadomasochism, Miller and Devon, Mystic Rose Books,1995, p. 235
2 The Loving Dominant, John Warren, ed.2, Greenery Press, 2000. p. 15
We have a new CHAT! Our new chat is sponsored by 321sexchat and we adore them for allowing the Garden Folk to invade their BDSM room! Please join us anytime for a nice chat about BDSM, D/s, recipes, grammar, or possibly cheese.
- on 02/22/2018 8:40 PM 0 Comments
11/9/17 Congratulations to the authors of our Discovery of Witches prompt contest! They all wrote great stories. Our winner is Fred Stephens, author of Under the Samhain Moon! Fred wins a bunch of signed novels. A huge thank you to Fred, andone, CaughtInTheQuiet, and Pars01 for sending wonderful stories! Thank you to everyone that took the time to read and vote. Be sure to catch A Discovery of Witches...
- on 11/01/2017 7:19 PM 0 Comments
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